Author: Роман Петров — 786
Love without workplace dependence
Romantic culture loves stories in which love overcomes asymmetries of rank, age and money. In reality dependence mixes consent with fear of the consequences. Relationships are especially risky where dependence…
Mistake and Cause
The popular cult of the mistake suggests celebrating every misstep as a free lesson. Mistakes are unavoidable, but they don’t become useful automatically. After a mistake, a person knows that…
Doubt Is a Signal, Not a Verdict
Doubt is useful when it reports a risk you have not accounted for. Before overtaking, transferring money, signing a contract or taking an irreversible step, the inner sense that something…
Monogamy, non-monogamy and the rules of a union
…the best thing is to explain each case separately, without trying to generalise. — Anton Chekhov, “About Love” (1898) Two couples call themselves monogamous. In the first, people count only…
The Individuality of Mass Production
Advertising invites you to express your uniqueness with a product that is simultaneously being sold to millions of people. There is an obvious contradiction in this, but not complete nonsense.…
A Pause Before Agreeing
Pressure loves urgency. The less time there is to think, the harder it is to check the terms, get advice and notice that the offer suits mainly whoever set the…
Hand the Routine to the Machine
A computer is most useful not when a person does their usual work faster with its help, but when they stop doing the repeatable part by hand. Calculations, sorting, renaming…
Substances Without the Romance
Youth culture and advertising describe substances either as a ticket to freedom or as instant moral collapse. For safety, what matters is not the symbol but the composition, the dose,…
Divorce as the Right to Exit
The leading cause of divorce is marriage. — An ironic aphorism Divorce is usually discussed as a breakdown: there was a marriage, it was supposed to continue, and something failed.…
A Leash Is Held at Both Ends
The things we own start making demands. A house needs repairs. A car needs servicing. A business needs support. A reputation needs defending. A collection needs storing. Even a beautiful…
You need a function, not an object
Before buying it helps to ask: What task is this thing supposed to solve? Not “do I want a shelf” but “what am I going to store and how”. Not…
A Promise Is a Debt
A good reputation does not remove the need for clear agreements. “I’ll try”, “we’ll see” and “I’ll do it” mark different degrees of commitment. The problem arises when the speaker…
Boxes and Averages
Public conversation loves categories: men and women, generations, professions, nations, introverts and extroverts. Thinking is impossible without categories, but the average characteristic of a group easily turns into an invented…
Children as an Irreversible Joint Project
Little children, little troubles; big children, big troubles. — Russian proverb A child is called a continuation of the parents. Then everyone is surprised when the continuation wants to live…
An Adult You Can Tell
Childhood morality offers two simple rules: always tell your parents, or never give up a secret you were trusted with. A dangerous situation calls for a different criterion — find…
Rest Does Not Have to Justify Itself
The culture of efficiency demands that even rest should develop you, impress people and pay for itself in photographs. Meanwhile rest without effort can be good rest, if your strength…
Reputation Outlasts the Impression
Looking successful and being successful are different projects. The first requires symbols: a title, clothes, an audience, the right photographs. The second requires reaching a goal that may make no…
A theory with an emergency exit
A convincing theory is especially pleasant for a society: it explains everything and leaves little room for doubt. But being able to explain what has already happened does not yet…
Why Families Interfere in the Choice of a Partner
No one can be as much of a stranger as a relative. — An ironic aphorism In 1753 the British Parliament passed Lord Hardwicke’s Act for England and Wales; Scotland…
A Phone Is Not a Safe
Digital culture sells the feeling of a secret space: a hidden folder, a disappearing message, a protected chat. But a secret section inside a phone is still part of the…