Category: Life lessons — 218
Stop Before the Last Drop
A first strong impression is hard to repeat. A new taste, a trip, a purchase, a game or falling in love delivers pleasure and novelty at once. On repetition the…
The reputation bubble
We can’t study every person from scratch each time. So we keep shortened models: reliable; funny; dangerous; competent; always late; a good listener. Reputation saves time. It helps you pick…
The Unfamiliar Without a Verdict
Public fear easily turns the unfamiliar into a threat, and then calls that reaction common sense or instinct. Not knowing someone else’s culture is normal; a confident verdict passed with…
Do Not Regret, Investigate
Motivational culture offers two equally simple extremes: regret nothing, or judge yourself for the past forever. The first sounds cheerful and is almost useless; the second produces punishment without new…
A Home That Does Not Hold You Hostage
Basic household skills give you freedom. It is worth being able to: do laundry and read clothing labels; keep a normal level of cleanliness; sew on a button; cook a…
A Gift Without a Receipt
From an economic point of view, money gives the recipient the maximum freedom of choice. A gift, however, does more than transfer value. It says: I thought about you. I…
Dignity Without a Rank Table
Hierarchy is useful for some tasks. On a ship, in an operating theatre and at an emergency site you cannot put every decision to a general vote. You need authority,…
The Old Address
Returning to a familiar place often promises a meeting not with the place but with your former self. We remember the street before the redevelopment, the job before the change…
Sex: Consent, Protection and a Plan for When It Fails
Sex requires voluntary and ongoing consent. A person can refuse before it starts or stop partway through. Earlier consent, a relationship, a gift or coming home together create no obligation.…
A reserve changes the price
Buying consumables in advance is sometimes cheaper than buying them at the moment of urgent need. But a stock saves money only under several conditions: the goods will definitely be…
Owning what can be lost
Every object will one day be lost, broken, sold, stolen or thrown away. Sometimes it simply outlives its owner and becomes a problem for his relatives. Daniel Kahneman, Jack Knetsch…
Different, but equal
Political language likes to choose between two convenient extremes: either all people are the same, or differences grant a right to a hierarchy of worth. People really do differ —…
Memory With Editing Rights
A memory is not a video recording. Frederic Bartlett had British participants read a Native American story, “The War of the Ghosts”, and then asked them to reproduce it after…
The Animal Did Not Read This Advice
Popular safety notes like one universal rule: do not run, make eye contact, make yourself look big, or drop to the ground. Animals of different species are under no obligation…
Service begins after payment
Most companies are courteous until you buy. The real quality of the relationship becomes clear after a problem appears. So when choosing a complicated service or a piece of equipment,…
Punish or prevent
A law forbidding an act does not accept that the act is normal. It accepts that the prohibition on its own is not enough. People know they must not steal…
Lawyer for Yesterday’s Self
Once a decision is made, the brain quickly hires itself out to us as a defence lawyer. The purchase turns out to have been sensible. The job we took was…
Heat, Sun and the Road
In a hot climate, light covered clothing often protects better than maximally bare skin. It reduces exposure to sun, dust and insects. You also need shade, water, a hat and…
Food and water on the road
Travel folklore sorts places into safe and dangerous by the sign over the door, the number of local customers or how familiar the dish is. Food risk is decided by…
The Option to Return It
A reversible decision is usually safer than an irreversible one. Sheena Iyengar and Mark Lepper ran a jam tasting in a shop. A large table with many varieties drew more…